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Personal Devleopment

Personal Development — lifestyle

Responsibility – Passing The Torch To Future Generations

I am about to become a father. My life is about to change in less than three weeks and it will never be the same again. I will think and behave differently. I will be reborn a new person and my life’s purpose will have changed forever. Everything I do will be for my family.

What is our ultimate goal as a parent? Is it to give our children the best life we can possibly give them? To prepare them for the long road of life ahead? To be there for them and care for them all along the way? All of the above, and much more I believe, but how does that translate on a global scale as a race?

We must leave the next generation in a better position. That is not to say that we give them materialistic wealth, but it is our responsibility to pass on knowledge, kindness and responsibility through example.

I believe it is our purpose in life to wake up, not as individuals, but as a race. This may not happen for a long time but it is in progress and we must work together to guide both those around us and those who will come after us to find our strength and our kindness.

The individual must act as part of the collective and the collective must embody the individual.

We will never lose our individuality, but as individuals working together, we make a strong collective.

We have seen great leaders in the past who have shone like beacons to guide us and future generations – Jesus, the Buddha, Mohammad, more recently, Mahatma Ghandi, Mother Theresa and Nelson Mandela.

There are those who are in positions of power today who are using that power to move us in the right direction.

They may not necessarily be enlightened but they are in a position to guide others and inspire future generations through example and guidance.

I believe that we have passed from the collective childlike state as a species in the last few generations and that we are ready to follow a path of change, care and responsibility.

We have leaders everywhere. Look around you now and you will see people leading by example. The woman who picks up the trash she did not drop. The man who smiles and acknowledges the homeless person.

We need to look up and become aware of the example around us that can help us reach our goals as a race, and in turn we can become those leaders and role models we need to be by working together through kindness. We can spread our example throughout our peers and instil it in the next generation.

As a species we have gone through life in a slumber. We were too immature to notice our actions towards each other and towards our surroundings.

We were children but now we are growing up. An awakening has started and we are ready to take on the responsibility of care, which is ours by default due to our intelligence. If we do not act, then who will?

We must take up the mantle of responsibility and kindness and share it among ourselves until it spreads like a spark in dry brush. We must pass it onto the next generation.

George Bernard Shaw said that “Life is no brief candle for me. It is a sort of splendid torch which I have got hold of for the moment, and I want to make it burn as brightly as possible before handing it on to future generations.”

Reality is in our grasp. It is there for us to see, beyond this screen. It is in front of us, we just need to look up and see it.

That is the first step.

Look up and meet someone else’s eyes. They are the leaders of the new world and you are their teacher. And Vice Versa. Together we are wakening up, to spread kindness and integrity and wield it like a shield to protect all life.

This is our responsibility as we are the most intelligent form of life that we know of. We are the only ones that have the power to come together to make all the difference. We have the power and it is our responsibility to use it wisely for the sake of our home and as Shaw says, pass the splendid torch onto future generations.

Who Do You Believe Is In Control Of Your Destiny?

What is your dream and how will you get there?

Do you dream big or do you settle for what you have?

You may already have everything you want but that doesn’t mean you don’t stop reaching. It doesn’t mean you stop searching.

If you have every step of your path laid out before you, then you know which direction to turn in your search when you are lost. Maybe you feel that you have already arrived at your destination. Ask yourself – have you? The journey doesn’t end so therefore the search doesn’t end.

Who do you believe is in charge of you and your destiny?

Is it the system?

Is it the beurocrats, the politicians, the government, your boss, your wages, your talents? No. These are all just aspects of your life.

I feel that the key word here is believe. Who do you BELIEVE is in charge or your destiny? It’s not society, it’s not the people who wronged you, forget them.

YOU ARE IN CHARGE, whether you believe that or not.

There’s that word again. That belief is what is important. That belief is what makes or breaks you. That belief defines you and shapes you into the person you will become.

If you don’t believe, then you will not change. Stand up, raise your chin, pull your shoulders back and declare to all in a strong voice “I am in charge of my own destiny.” Grab the bull the horns and get out there into the storm of a world we have to weather and take what is yours.

Take your destiny.

I speak metaphorically here, but the power is there, all you have to do is take charge. You have the power to get out of bed and go for a run before work. You have the power to spend one hour less watching Netflix and read a book from the library. You have the power to chose a salad or a pizza.

You are in charge of your destiny and don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.

Who do you think was in charge of Christopher Reeves destiny? Or Stephen Hawking? Or Viktor Frankl? Was it the horse that threw superman to the ground and broke his back? Motor neurone disease which slowed the world renowned physicist down to a physical stop but did it take charge of his life? The Nazis took everythign from Frankl but they did not best him.

Paralyzing injuries, debilitating sickness and an army of evil could not overpower these people.

They had the drive to keep going, to push through the hardest, life ending moments, to crawl through a river of shit and come out clean on the other side just like Andy Defresne in The Shawshank Redemption.

Forget about the privelaged folk who have everything, forget about the people you think you need to compare yourself to – they are not in charge of your destiny.

They do not care about your destiny. It is in your hands and you are in charge.

Take a pause and look around. Where are you? What are you going to do next? What did you eat today? Did you exercise? What did you learn? If you dont like the answer to any of these questions, remember that the rest of your life starts now and you are in control.

You have the power to change and shape your destiny as you chose. Not as someone else choses but as you chose.

Get up, look up, get out there and do what it is that makes you feel strong and powerful and keep on doing it. Keep on looking up.

You have the power to do what you want.

Peace,

George

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How To Be Productive In The Evenings During The Work Week: A More Relaxed Approach

Before we get into our evening routine & how we stay productive, let’s start from the beginning.

Each year we create our annual goals just before New Year’s Day. We record our goals under categories; Personal, Health & Wellness, Fitness, Financial, Future Business, Work, Home & Travel. All goals are written in our journals so we can review them daily/weekly/monthly. An important step which we love to do is to review the goals from the previous year and mark off what was achieved & what we have to work on, if it’s still a goal for the New Year.

Once all our goals are listed, we work towards them every day.

Creating the bigger picture of how & where you want your life to go over the next year will determine what you want to achieve in your day.

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For example, under the heading of Health & Wellness, we have a goal to have less stress in our life. How do we work towards less stress in our life, every morning we meditate, we wake up early to sit together to have our breakfast, we give ourselves lots of time in the mornings to get ready before work. All of this creates a calmer more chill morning for us so we can arrive at work rested & energised for a new day. We plan time into each part of our day to relax, chill & enjoy life.

Under the heading of Fitness, we have the goal to exercise daily. Our goal each day is to move for a minimum of 60 min. This can come in the form of 2 half hour walks on our breaks, or workouts in the evenings.

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We have figured out through trial & error the activities & goals we like to work towards in the morning and what we like to tackle in the evenings. The evenings are a mixture of relaxation & energy. We like to plan a week in advance for our evening activities. In our journals we list 3 tasks that we would like to achieve each night. Each task should be no longer than an hour. Therefore, we spend about 3 hours each evening working on specific goals.

These goals can range from:

1. Prepare dinner for next 3 nights

2. Read 25 pages of book

3. Go for 40 min walk

1. Iron clothes

2. Write Blog

3. Read 25 pages of book

1. Eco night

2. Go for walk /Yoga class

3. Write Letter to niece

We only assign 3 goals per evening. This more relaxed approach to the evenings takes the pressure off having to get a whole pile of stuff done & feeling really bad when we don’t achieve all 10 items we had on our list.

Usually we get home between 5pm & 6pm, we eat dinner, read, write or do jobs and exercise. All of these things align with our bigger picture goals.

TV is avoided in the evenings from Monday to Thursday in our home so we can use our time wisely during the week.

By the time we finish our evening tasks it usually about 8:30-9:00pm. We use this last hour to really wind down, take a bath, read more, play a board game, read some of our favourite blogs, listen to podcasts or audiobooks or just have a chat.

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Bedtime for us is between 9:30pm and 10:00pm. Lights are out at either 9:45pm or 10:00pm (George likes to read a little later…..I usually fall asleep with book in hand or mid-sentence!…No issues with sleep here..lol)

That’s essentially our evenings and how we make use of our time to work on goals that are important to us one hour at a time. Goals can be daunting but broken down into hours they really are achievable. We aim for slow & steady change overtime. We are definitely the turtle in the race. We joke about my Father that he is the man who is walking while all the others are running……. that’s how we want to approach life too. Slow & steady wins the race, apply it to your goals.

We hope this was helpful.

As always, we would love to hear your comments & feedback.

Have a great week,

Chat soon,

Theresa

What Do You Do And Should It Define You?

How many times have you been asked “what do you do?”

What has you answer been? Do we really stop to think about the meaning of this question? There are in fact no limits to the answer, but what do we really mean when we ask this? Why are we asking?

Are we genuinely interested in what other people do for a living? Maybe we are and maybe we are not, but from my own perspective, my day job is the last thing I want to talk about when I am in a social situation.

Some people are genuinely interested in a discussion about your profession and finding common ground but it is more commonly a conversation starter to break the ice. In my opinion there are more effective ways to find common ground like asking “what do you do in your spare time.”

I recently watched a video on Youtube titled Never tell people what you do. The speaker encourages us to talk about what we want to do rather than what we do. I am far more interested in talking about my interests and hearing about other peoples interests rather than their profession.

What we do for a living does not define us. Many of us work our day jobs to finance what we truly love. It is only the luckiest people on Earth who can claim that they work in their dream job.

What defines us? That is subjective. It is also a matter of perspective. I think a more accurate question is what defines us in the eyes of those who matter.

Our achievements define us to a certain extent but I think it is more accurate to say that our actions define us. I have been lucky enough to meet many high achievers who are well educated and professionally successful but this achievement was arrived at through their actions.

One can only be judged on their actions. Who is to say the homeless man on the street is not a higher achiever than the suit, with fine clothes rushing about taking meetings on the fly?

How is success measured? By what we do to earn a living? By how much we earn? By the clothes we wear? By the fact that one person smells of cologne and another smells of the street?

Do we judge these people on their actions or their achievements? We judge how we judge, but we can only see what is on the surface. To dig deeper we need to look deeper. We need to really see.

I gave some cans to a homeless man and he told me this would help him reach his quota for donations to the children’s hospital. The cynical side of me doubts him but who am I to judge? I can only see the surface. Who is to say that man is not working tirelessly to save money for others.

“There are no perfect people in the world, only perfect intentions.”

(Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves)

My point is that what we do on a daily basis to earn money does not scratch the surface of who we are. We should look deeper. Ask deeper. Dig deeper. Find the real people.

Thanks for reading,

Peace,

George

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Are You A Multi-Tasker?

Do you consider yourself a good multi-tasker? Can you multi task? Think about it for a minute before you read further.

I don’t think there is such a thing as a good multi tasker. In fact, I dont think multi tasking is even possible. Here’s my thoughts.

I try not to take my day job home, but sometimes it is necessary. Wheb I had to do this I would play Netflix in the background while going through emails on my laptop. Multi tasking. Watching a movie while working.

The truth is that I concentrated on neither task fully and I would have been much better off working with no distractions to completely finish my task and then sit down to enjoy something on TV.

The lesson here is that multi tasking does not lead to productivity. Single tasking does.

In other words, we need to concentrate on the task at hand until we have successfully completed it or reached a milestone where we are happy to move on to something different.

This is something we find very difficult to do nowadays. There is so much additional stimulation that we find it difficult to concentrate on one thing for any length of time. Even as I write this I feel the urge to check my smart phone.

In my opinion this is connected to the current smart phone / screen addiction. Maybe the effect of short term gratification from todays technological gizmos are wiring our brains to multi task more. I am willing to bet that multi tasking is a relatively recent phenomenon since the invention of screens and phones.

Todays technology also makes us more accessible to interruptions, forcing us to multi task. In some circumstances these are unavoidable but you can put measures in place like putting your phone in flight mode, closing your door or telling people to f*** off (JOKING – maybe don’t do that, we all about distressing and getting along here).

I think that we are also over whelmed with too much information these days. Too much information gives us too much to deal with and so we feel the need to multi task. The result is that you do not put your full attention into these items.

We also have the illusion that we will achieve more through multi-tasking. The brain rewards us with a dopamine hit when we complete a task but the satisfaction would be far greater if we complete a task knowing that we have given it our full attention.

We also have to deal with the ASAP syndrome. As an experiment in your professional life, take note over the next week of what the response is when you ask somebody “When do you need this?” I am going to guess 80% of the time the answer will be yesterday or asap. This encourages our desire to multi task. Outside pressure forces us to jump straight into action mode, rather than taking a breath to assess where we are at and what are our next actionable items.

The term, “jack of all trades, master of none,” applies to multi tasking. We certainly cannot be experts in anything when we spread ourselves too thin. Jacks of all tasks, masters of none. We are juggling our work load, but just like a juggler, we have a couple of different balls in the air, but we are only touching one at a time. In other words, we may think we are multi tasking but we are actually rapidly switching between tasks. It is this rapid switching which prevents from concentrating fully on any one task.

Put down the balls and pick up one at a time. When we attempt to multi task it may actually take 40% longer than putting our full effort into it. This brings me back to my Netflix / work example. I could have worked single mindedly for half the time rather than splitting my attention between two tasks.

According to Clifford Nass, a communication professor at Stanford, the more we multi task, the more difficult we find to learn, concentrate and be nice to people. I can think of many times where I cut somebody off or was rude because I had too many things going on at one time.

Nass says that if you think you are good at multi tasking, you aren’t. “People who multi task all the time can’t filter out irrelevancy. They can’t manage a working memory. They’re chronically distracted.” This is something I struggle with my self. I find it difficult to filter out the irrelevant and shut out the distractions.

Just as practising self control and meditation re-wire our brains, multi tasking also rewires our brain. These scattered habits have a similar scattering effect on our brain and our attention span.

Many studies support the fact that humans cannot multi task, we rapidly shift attention between tasks which does not allow us enough time to give these items our full concentration. This effects our proficiency and dilutes our abilities.

It is my intention to try to devote my full attention to everything, single mindedly, whether it is reading a book, answering emails or having a conversation with someone in a bar. If we take the time to pause, we can clearly define our next goals and the next task we need to address, making it easier to avoid hopping from one task to another and back again in quick succession.

Remember to focus. F.O.C.U.S.

Follow one course until success.

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Peace,

George